twinz2swt4u's Xanga

17th bday wishlist </3

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 17:37:35 GMT

Here I am writing my wishlist where no one will see it BWAHAHAHAHA =P

1) Twins Boxset (6 year anni set)
http://www.yesasia.com/us/our-sixth-anniversary-limited-collection-boxset-12cd-12dvd-with-oversized/1005161033-0-0-0-en/info.html
** OMG BEN WANTING THIS SINCE IT CAME OUT! LIKE everyone chip in and get me this and I'd sooooo appreciate it too =D

2) Twins Old CDs
    a) Our Souvenior Album
    b) Love Dunk
    c) Ichiban

3) Boy'Z Old CDs
    a) Hurray
    b) a year to remember
    c) La La World

4) Fahrenheit CDs
    a) Stay With You (Japanese version) with photo book
    b) preorder TREASURE
    c) 2 side fahrenheit version 3 **i have the 1st 2 i ned the 3rd final version rofl.

5) Rolling Love stuff
a) Photo book
b) OST

6) A&F perfume "8"

7) Coach, Marc Jacobs, Juicy Long Wallet

8) Juicy Handbag

9) anything cute and fluffy... anything cool =D im happy with any DVDs or CDs or whatevers haha... anything cute and fluffy too... iono~ =D

I'm UGLYYYYY, I'm GAYYYY! I'm a HORRIBLE PERSON!

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 23:39:25 GMT

pissed off pissed off pissed off

im damn pissed off... im a horrible person definitely horrible... u hear the fireworks outside? i SHOULD b smiling but nope... inside typing my entry with a stabbed heart ROFL i AMMM totally corny. well yeah. im a horrible person yep... im this im that im this im that... im this im that im this im that... i dont need u all to keep reminding me thank you very much. HAHA please stop it haha... u dun need to tell me 24/7 that im a human born imperfect... that when i look in the mirror im an imperfection (ok that was corny once again *stabs self*) haha... yes... i do not need this from you people. i beg of you to stop constantly telling me. yep i dont mind much~ but there are some things that hurt. most things dont... but some things stab. stopp it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it please please please stop it stop it... update in my private blog if u people know of it ROFL. doubt so HAHA =P private blogging whenever i get my laptop back *sigh* </3 i need you... i need Him... haha i'll b ok with due time. im sorry im not perfect.

UPS and DOWNS

Wed, 30 Apr 2008 00:58:57 GMT

Havent had an update on my life since forevers. I've had some highlights since my last emo depression and confession of love about twins.

A) Anniversary with Lilian 4.17 (it was a disaster)
B) Married to Arnald 4.19
C) Anniversary with Hosanna and Charissa 4.23/29
D) Camp Metamorphosis (that was somewhat interesting)
E) I was sick for a whole month and stayed at home for a whole month.

My pathway goes on and on... so much stress and so much work load. Yesterday I did a writing assignment project, 3 AP English exam essays, and 8 homework assignments. I actually made it in that one day along with school. I still have much to accomplish and get done. SATS are this weekend and AP Psych is within 2 weeks. I will bury my head in that review book for AP Psych, I don't think I can afford a 3. Marking period is ending and I have no hope or whatsoever, I think I dropped like 10 points from my score. </3

Today Mr. Chan came to look for me. He told me that he had a meeting about me and will have yet another one. He wants me to take the Chinese regents and then take AP Chinese next year. Chinese regents is on the same day as Japanese regents. By Golly` I'd have to go to the lunch room and take 2 language regents in a day. I don't think I can breathe. Why the heck is my school so hard? I don't even know if I should take 3 AP languages next year. I don't think I want to stay that long in school. Everybody gets out mad early, but my schedule is always 2 more periods then average ever since freshmen year... WHY?!!!

Freshmen YEAR :: 2-10
Sophmore YEAR :: 3-11
Junior YEAR :: 1-9

What have I done to myself? LOL I'm hoping I would stop strangling myself and let myself breathe. This would be my schedule for next year basically (order unknown)

1) AP ENG
2) AP CHINESE
3) AP JAP (may not even do this...)
4) US Hist/Econ (I really don't think I should AP this.... if I do AP this then no AP Jap)
5) Art/Music (I actually have enough credits to grad, and enough instruments but... only have an 88 on my transcript for this b/c composing class pulled my 98's and stuff down to 88 and I wanna pull this grade up since it averages on my GPA so... YEAH xP)
6) Skills Gym
7) Math

YES I FINISHED ALL SCIENCES! LOL 2 year Bio, Earth Sci, 2 year Chem, Basics Physics, AP Psych! I made it!!! NO SCIENCES! ROFLLLL this will probably pull up my average ROFL... math & science always brought it down. A 1-7 is actually pretty long... I would've had that even this year... xP I should cut AP JAP & Art/Music and get a 1-5 XD to ensure senioritis won't get the best of me... =)

LALALALA on the up side... I went to BEN&JERRYS today just to get my free cone! I traveled from Queens all the way to Manhattan... some may say I'm crazy but it's worth it to take a break from my workload =) I went to 34th street then walked to 42nd =) It was fun! Had 3 cones and that was my dinner right there... SO FULL! tehe XD Have another one tomorrow night O_O Man I'm just havin icecream for dinner! So unhealthy.

Oh dear... I miss running in the rain... I miss that feeling of having nothing to worry about. BUT IM STILL JOYFUL CUZ IM IN JOY!!!! LALALALALALALA~ I am... a rubber badn that does not break! I am.... SUPERWOMAN!!!! lalala *song plays in my head* "... but I am only human..." oh shut up gary cao ROFL

My job oh dear dear dear~ I don't think I can afford another job at the moment... www.tocmusic.com wanted to hire me... but I don't think I can take it at the moment... and also this company called KeysPiano... Maybe during senior year I will have more free time. If they truly want me... they will come back to me... *sigh* but TOC is such a good opportunity... LaGuardia status yo` *sigh* oh well... fate shall decide.

TO-DO LIST::
A) Get that thing for "her" (those who know will know *cough*)
B) Record demo for Florinda's wedding song!
C) Band up her song
D) Finish recording and producing CD "Love's Melody"
E) Tend my shop C'adore O_O no new updates yo`
F) Boot-camp for music
G) Study hard for APS
H) teach harder. train harder. love my students.
I) Record "Yuan Dian" with Lilian!!! (man this delayed like 2 years O_O)
J) STOP SKIPPING GUITAR LESSONS! OH EM GEEZ!~

thats about it =) long long rambling cuz I havent done this in while... thanks for reading my ramble whoeverrrr XD

My Love for Twins

Wed, 12 Mar 2008 15:59:12 GMT

Twins forever... I know they dun have the best vocals. But I definitely know they are hardworking. I know they may not be the prettiest around, but they definitely arent bad. I know they may not be the best people, but I know they arent the worst. I know there are things behind the scenes we don't know, so I do not judge. I know the aren't as popular anymore, but they've surely made history. I know people may lose interest in them, but I will still love them forever.

I admire their passion. I admire their love towards each other. I love them forever and ever. I will only love them more and more with each and every day, and it will not fade away.

I know I don't listen to their music as frequently anymore nor do I sing their songs as much. But it doesnt mean I lost any love for them. I still support them by purchasing their CDs and KTVs & movies.

I loved twins ever sing I was 10. They were the first I ever loved, and that is marked really deeply into my heart. I don't think anyone or anything can replace their spots in my heart. I have to say, I'm a person who changes frequently and loves new things and often forgets the old. Twins are one of the very few special things that actually held a place in my heart and did not just fade away.

I've often panicked what I'd do if there was no longer twins. I thought about it deeply and I think I would have lost a part of my life... lost a part of myself. Twins has made up my identity. Twins is a part of me. Everybody knows me as a Twins fan and calls me a crazy fan. I have to say, I am not a crazy fan. I won't go a certain extent for them... but my heart will always have them. My heart will say the most for them...

I'm proud to say :: I am a Twins fan forever and ever; and they make me... me...

PS: Please do not ask me anymore questions regarding Gillian & Edison's scandal. I will make my final comment and that is the end of it. I find further gossiping about it rude. I never did like discussing too much about media news anyways, as I thought that media kills people indirectly; no matter emotionally or physically. So this is my very last.

Note that Gillian never meant for it to be exposed as it is part of their private life. Sex nowadays is very common and shouldn't be made into such a big deal. The only thing that made it big is because of media and people taking a liking to gossip. It is surely inevitable. Yet if she wasn't a celebrity, it would just be a 27 year old woman having a relationship with a man. Also as someone has already said, people deserve second chances and I definitely believe Gillian has gotten her punishment out of this. For Twins fans who turned into Gillian haters out there who believe they were betrayed and tricked; NOTE THIS! Gillian has never said anything about her private life that brings her out as this innocent angel. She is a woman, even if she was not with Edison Chen do you believe she has never had a boyfriend before? Also in the entertainment industry, there are many things you do not and will not ever know. The entertainment circle is dark, so things even worse are inevitable.

PPS: It is not because I am a Twins fan, but even logically thinking; this is the conclusion I've made up.

-- say no more.

為可永遠放不底

Wed, 20 Feb 2008 05:58:36 GMT

真的糟了。我又再一次把別人的痛放在自己身上。我本來就快要扛不下。但怎樣難我也要計續扛下去。只要我一放手就天下大亂了。她說我的家庭背境來說﹑我該成熟到像一個18歲的女孩。但誰能理解一個人孤身作戰完全沒依靠之苦呢? 當一個人發現全世界都沒有人懂她的時候﹑當一個人發現世界那麼大也找不到棲身之所的時候。還能扛得下﹑為了顧全大局忍氣吞聲的那上算不夠成熟嗎? 我有嘗試過告訴妳們我某些苦。但妳們卻把我掉在路邊。不顧我的感受。我想了再想三思了許多遍。心靈受到傷害我把心情告訴妳們想挽留感情希望我還有機會感受到溫暖。但發覺真的不成。妳們只會拒絕我的痛﹑反過來覺得我是錯的說我太幼稚了。為可永遠放不下呢? 我會計續扛下去。就算是活在痛苦之中也沒所謂。我會計續努力的。這是我最後一次發表我的心聲。妳們愛聽就聽。但我知道妳們一定會當沒看到的。

--妳說得對。我是很愛我身邊的人。不斷的為他們付出。我知道愛多錯多的。但我改不了。我本想和你分響一下希望大家能找到一個辦法解決但既然妳已決定是我的問題。不能大家一起努力那我不勉強妳。我懂反正所有人都是覺得我是錯的那一個。永遠都是這樣。沙士比亞說﹕Expectations is the root to all heartache. 我會自己努力的。

--妳永遠都不會站在我的立場想一想的。。。對吧。永遠都只會覺得我所做的是錯的。

--你也一樣只會覺得我是刁蠻公主的。

--妳常常無意中讓我非常的痛。我知道妳不是故意的。但無情力也是很痛的。

--謝謝你懂我了。你是我的證明證明我不是永遠錯的那一個。因為你知道我所有的苦。才懂今天的我的心的路有多苦。有些事跟先入為主的他們說也是白說的。有你在就給我一種肯定。不是我永遠的錯是你們都不懂我了。

--妳說妳懂我。但是到最後妳還是輕易的把我弄得傷痕苦不含言。

--我受夠你們這群三八。你們不要再把我惹火了。再說阿嬌的話我怕我會把你們給宰了。

我還扛得下。我還能堅強得起來。我是多多都扛得下的。

長大後+新年快樂

Wed, 06 Feb 2008 18:24:53 GMT

人長大了就會有愈來愈多的沒有。有愈來愈多沒有可能辦到的事。長大後也有更多沒有辦發回應的話。長大後有更多沒有人照顧的時後。長大後有愈來愈多沒有理由的愛情挫折。人長大後真的有很多的沒有但是讓人長大的也是這些沒有。-- 伊勝雪@鬥牛。要不要

祝大家新年快樂萬事如意! 小朋友快高長大!~ 身體健康!

--

超開心剛錄完梁山伯與茱麗葉的 demo! V 的聲線好了許多啦! 星期天可以 [中國話] BWAHAHAHHA <3

唱呀。我要唱呀~

Sun, 03 Feb 2008 05:59:39 GMT

病到上不到假音。超可憐﹑急不及待想要病好。有很多歌要唱耶~

2/10 -- 中國話 (live performance) - 4E.V.E.R (V 現在上不到合音怎麼辦?!)

-- 再來再來 (終於找到好的男聲了! 好開心呀~ 要知道男聲不易找耶。)

粱山伯與茱麗葉
I Still Believe
三個心願/天天夜夜/需要你的愛

--- 再來再來再來 (有另外兩個女的了)

你最近還好嗎
愛來過

---- SOLO SOLO SOLO!!!

來不及
你

自以為是+我決定走了

Sat, 02 Feb 2008 04:09:22 GMT

看到妳落淚我心也破碎了。不是想傷害妳。妳要知道傷害深愛的人比自己心痛還要難受。現在不再想了。FORGET IT.... 煩腦夠多了。

-- Twins mode.

我過去太看重我哪裡再有掛念我
沒有我　實際令他好過
在我眼內看著怎麼過
被貶低多難過
眼前沒有我更愉快得多
未跌過　尚以為少不得我
現我哪兒去躲
我眼淚教他唱歌　殘忍得痛楚
他想世上人　略去我 (消失我他才　盡興過)

===>

不想等　你先走遠　才　陣腳亂
就當我的　理論膚淺
假裝你被我　厭倦
堂皇地將處境扭轉
也許能　豁免　心酸

一點　都不酸　怕酸的我
就介意給你引發我幽怨
因此我　愈笑　愈甜
昂然拔出我的寶劍
來面對　年度裡　最壞那天

＊我決定走了　我放下字條
　以百分一秒　明快的結束了
　與你若果完了　我不想再撒嬌
　走得有型　總好過　留低打擾

　我決定走了　我拒絕動搖
　我帶著笑　退出　我想瀟灑些少　ya ya
　今天這一走　損失多少　來年大概會揭曉
　等他朝　先點算　不管了＊

不要　捉得到　你這飛鳥
讓我脫身了　也夠慶祝了
即使以後要治療
仍然絕不痛哭慘叫
提及你　還在氣　會被看小

REPEAT＊

還是永遠都放不下呢?

發了可愛不可愛瘋~

Thu, 24 Jan 2008 21:49:05 GMT

Twins 未讓我失望過!!! 她們的新專輯桐話妍語超棒的!!! 雖然我生病了所以未能買回家但兩天後必去把他買回家!!! 實在太棒了耶~ 人們` 我不知道你們看不看得見。但.... 在她們的新專輯裡的妍語篇和桐話篇有一首一樣但不同版本的歌 -- 可愛不可愛。歌詞寫得超好。還有兩個版本的歌詞是對唱的。好像阿SA 是唱給阿嬌聽的一樣。可以成為對唱。所以網路上很多人都想把這兩個版本remix起來。是超棒的~ 這首歌是Twins 對戀愛的觀感。猜不到她們真不虧是孖女耶。心電感應~ 本人未聽完全個專輯但真的激力推介這個專輯。現在先po 一 po 歌詞。

可愛不可愛（桐話版）

＊可愛可不愛　不用心請離開　愛的光彩失去比想像中要快
　誰不期待　被崇拜也被寵壞
　（4x不是最好的我不愛　不屬於我的我不愛）
　你分了心　我會禮尚往來
我所有興趣　你要好好記住　兩個人相處並不是魔術
你對我付出　我一定十倍對你付出　只要你全力以赴
＃我要的幸福一點都不模糊　我跟你跳舞　你別錯一步
　相遇是兩個人的地圖　感情是危險的建築　我受過傷害　我不會再盲目
Repeat＊＃　太多經歷不能清除　太多不該收的信物　我不能讓眼淚腐蝕我皮膚
Repeat＊＊　爲了我的未來　我不想一切聽天安排　跟陌生的人戀愛更悲哀

可愛不可愛（妍語版）

＊可愛可不愛　我不想你離開　愛的光彩決定兩個人的未來
　我很期待　花一生對你崇拜
　（4x每一天給你一點愛　每一天珍惜你的愛）
　我不想尋找另一個門牌
你聽的音樂　我會好好記住　兩個人相處是一種藝術
我要你付出　我先要十倍對你付出　每件事我都在乎
＃我要的幸福一點都不模糊　我讓你滿足　我才會滿足
　相遇是兩個人的地圖　感情是危險的建築　只能用心蓋　不能先找退路
Repeat＊＃　不想被你當作寵物　卻想變成你的專屬　我會好好保護感情的收入
Repeat＊＊　對一個人慷慨　先不問會有什傷害　只能跟自己戀愛更悲哀

Jiro... i love you.

Tue, 22 Jan 2008 22:52:48 GMT

The life story of my love Jiro... made me wanna cry </3 everybody should respect jiro.

Jiro's father was a regular manager for a building, and his mother didn't work because of old age and bad eyesight. They had Jiro when they were around 40, so he's considered "Lao Lai Zi"*. Maybe it's because of that, Jiro's health wasn't very good, but his mother and father loved him a lot. Later, Jiro's father had diabetes, so he went in and out of the hospital for 5 years. However, Jiro's father still passed away. Before he died, he said to Jiro: "You have to take up the responsibility of this family."** He agreed. That year, Jiro was 18 years old.
Probably it was since then, to support the family and to return loans [When his father was still alive, he borrowed aprox. 6 million yuan from the bank to buy the house they now lived.] He began to take part-time jobs everywhere, sometimes he worked 3 shifts a day. He worked in a bar, in a zoo, and some people even says that he worked to transport coal...
At around that time, Jiro started to model part-time. Then the BMG Company saw potential in him, so they were going to sign Jiro, Jay Chou, and Jordan Chen[I think thats his name..o_O''] to the 3-J Plan*. But sadly, the 911 incident happened, part of the company's market was corrupted, and of course, as a new idol, Jiro was fired on the spot. But Jiro didn't give up, he signed another company, but after he found out that they weren't interested in making him into an idol, he felt completely beat. So he joined the Army for 2 years. When he came back, he decided to be a Modeling Assistant, since he doesn't have the courage to return to the stage and make his dreams come true anymore. At that time, he was pretty well known among the Taiwan Entertainment Market, everyone knew there was this guy who had a guitar on his back and follows the Modeling Stylist everywhere. Is also at this time he met a lot of Commercial Producer, so later he began to act in Commercials.
Then one time he met the President of the Ke Mi Company*, when they wanted to sign him to a contract, he hesitated. Because of the so many failures before, he can't help but feel worried and afraid.. Then he remembered something a person said to him before: "When you're old, you're going to say to your son, son, your dad had a dream, but he didn't have the courage to chase it..."**
It's what his friend said to him gave him the courage to try again. Jiro thought that when one's young, that's when one should chase their dreams, not wanting to regret later, he agreed the Ke Mi Company.
Then he had the opportunity to act in ISWAK 1*, as Ah Jin. For a person who likes to Rock, and loves to Sing, acting isn't their specialty. And sometimes even a little bit embarissing for them. But the director of ISWAK 1 said to Jiro: "Acting isn't only acting, You have to put your heart in it!"** Jiro remembered what he's been told, and slowly he began to love acting. Jiro believes that it's all because of the director of ISWAK 1, so he's very respectful of him...

Jiro got famous because of Fahrenheit in 06 and earned 2.5million yuan [Net]. But every month, he only saves 5000 Yuan for himself to use. Because he still need to return loans, the loan now is aprox. 10 million yuan. So he still have a long way to go from returning all the loans.

Jiro is poor, but he knows to work hard, to earn money. In the year 06, he never stopped acting, he never stopped working, because he still need to return the loans, and to support his family. He doesn't have rich families like all the other Fahrenheit Members, so he needs to keep on working if he want to support his family. When Aaron and Calvin can study, when Chun can even go back to Brunei for a vacation, Jiro can only keep on working and working. Only because he wants to support his family and to return the debt.
Because of his poor health, he often loses his voice, so he always has the medicine his mom prepared for him, Tong Da Hai*. Behind the stage, he's always so quiet, only because the doctor told him if he doesn't want to lose his voice again.. then don't talk as much. And because of Xerophthalmia*, he once couldn't complete the filming because he couldn't open his eyes. he also has Rhinitis*, which is why when he sings it sounds like the sound is coming from his nose. Once he was brought to the hospital by a staff of the filming crew, when the doctor suggested him to use Bird's Nest* to condition his health, he refused. Only because he feels it's too expensive. Finally, on the Christmas of 06, Jiro first nose bleed for the whole day then fainted while filming. The reason is because of long-term stress, and plus they were filming a raining scene. The staff of the crew send him directly to the Hospital and he stayed there for three days straight... And that was the first time Jiro spent his Christmas in a hospital...

We always see the happy Jiro on TV, but how many people actually knows of his life and his pain? He always brings happiness and carries happiness to us, but always keeps the suffering to himself.
Remember he told a Chord: "Never shed a tear for the stress from work, because it's your choice!" **
Jiro might not have realized it, but what he said had a great impact on a Chord. Yes, Jiro is that kind of person, no matter how tired, how much stress he gets from work, he would never drop a tear. Because he knows, it's the road he chose. So he has to keep on going...

-- chinese translations

*
Lao Lai Zi
--〉老來子 In Chinese it means that the parents are old when they have the child.
3-J Plan
--〉 3-J 計劃
Ke Mi Company
--〉可米公司
ISWAK 1
--〉It started with a Kiss
Tong Da Hai
--〉通大海
Xerophthalmia
--〉干眼症
Rhinitis
--〉鼻炎
Bird's Nest
--〉燕窝 A very expensive medicine, used to condition your health.

**
"You have to take the responsibility of this family."
--〉 "你要肩負起養這個傢的責任..."
"When you're old, you're going to say to your son, son, your dad had a dream, but he didn't have the courage to chase it..."
--〉"你想將來老的時候對著你兒子說兒子阿爸爸曾經有個夢想但是一直沒有勇氣去完成..."
"Acting isn't only acting, You have to put your heart in it!"
--〉"演戲不只是演的而是要用心去演..."
"Never shed a tear for the stress from work, because it's your choice!"
--〉"絕對不要因爲工作的辛苦而去掉一滴眼淚因爲這是你的選擇！"